Episode #: 001
Publication Date: March 10, 2019
Episode Length: 00:28:30
Host: Tom Hirsch
URL: http://TRADITIONS.buzzsprout.com
Show Transcript: www.Your-Special-Day.net/TRADITIONS/
Your Comments: Tom@Your-Special-Day.net
1 Jumping the Broom
This tradition dates back to the 1600s and is believed to come from west-African weddings and Wiccan communities.
"Jumping the Broom" is a ceremony where the bride and groom, either at the ceremony itself or at the reception, signify their entrance into a new life and their creation of a new family by symbolically "sweeping away" their former single lives, former problems and concerns, and jumping over the broom to enter upon a new adventure as husband and wife.
It became popular in the United States during the 1970s, after the publication of Alex Haley’s book “Roots.” Movie Jumping the Broom (2011) Movie received mixed reviews from critics. About 50/50
2 Unity Candle
The ritual of lighting a unity candle, which began about 30 or 40 years ago, represents the joining of two people and their families. Before the parents from both sides take their seats, they (traditionally the mothers) each light a taper and place it next to a pillar candle that remains unlit throughout the ceremony. After the couple exchanges their vows, they light the pillar candle using the flames from the two tapers, signifying several generations of commitment. Sometimes the three candles remain lit – sometime they will extinguish the two tapers and just leave the pillar lit. When all three remain burning one taper represents each of them, and the pillar for the unity of their new family, and as symbols of their commitment to each other and to a lasting and loving marriage.
3 Sand Ceremony
The exact origins of this one are fuzzy, but it was popularized in the early 2000s on the TV show The Bachelorette. For this wedding ceremony ritual, the couple pours two separate vases of sand (usually different colors) into the same vessel, creating a layered, one-of-a-kind pattern. From that point forward, it will be impossible to ever separate the colors, which symbolizes the blending of the two forever. Some couples personalize the ritual by choosing sand from meaningful locations during their courtship. Although similar to the unity candle, the flame eventually will blow out; the sand is permanent. It’s a lasting memento to display in your home. Sand is also a better choice for an outdoor wedding since wind is less of a concern.
The ceremony expresses the coming together of two people or two families into one new family. It’s a very simple idea that can be incredibly powerful. Typically, each person has different colored sand and takes turns pouring it into one clear vessel, forming a layered effect. Sometimes just the couple participates, and sometimes the couple's children or parents join in with their own colored sand, adding to the layers of colors, and expressing the harmony of the entire family.
Usually, the officiant says a few words about the ceremony and its meaning, then hands each person a vase of colored sand.
The first person (often the groom) starts by pouring his sand into the central vase.
Then, the second person (usually the bride) pours her sand into the central vase, forming a second layer.
If other family members are participating, they each pour their sand into the central vase. If it's just the couple, they typically each add another layer to the vase.
To finish, everyone pours at the same time, forming a mix of colors at the top that represents the united family. Keep in mind that the more people you include, the more difficult it will be for everyone to pour at the same time.
Couples may choose to place this ritual at any point in their ceremony, or even as a separate ritual at the reception. But, the most popular (and perhaps the most logical) time is immediately following the ring exchange and vows, allowing the sand ceremony to feel almost like a culmination of the ritual, once you have already been joined in marriage.
There are many variations on the theme of how to perform this tradition and what supplies are needed. A little bit of internet research will yield a wealth of suggestions.
4 Love Letters
This is a newer ritual, but I love the romantic notion behind it. Before the wedding, you and your spouse write love letters to each other and then seal them inside a box during the ceremony. Traditionally, the letters are accompanied by a bottle of your favorite wine or champagne. You'll eventually open the box at a later date, such as an anniversary or milestone.
That “later date” could be the occasion of your first major argument as a married couple; thus, the colloquial name for this ritual being the “First Fight Box.”
During your wedding, you promise to take each other for better or worse, in good times and in bad. On the day of your wedding, when you’re more in love than you’ve ever been before, it can be hard to even imagine that you might go through a rough patch down the road that has the ability to break your relationship.
But - - - let’s face it: You’re going to fight. In fact, it can be healthy to fight if you do it the right way. There are volumes written on THAT subject. But there may be a time when you need to remind yourself why you fell in love in the first place. Enter the Fight Box.
Before your big day, gather a wooden box, a bottle of wine and two glasses. Write love notes to each other, explaining your feelings as you prepare to start your new life together as husband and wife. Seal your letter without letting each other read what you’ve written.
During the ceremony, place the love notes inside the wooden box with the wine and glasses. Take turns hammering the box shut, one nail at a time, until the box is sealed.
Agree to keep the box sealed until a special anniversary, like your 10th or 20th, unless you hit a rough patch. Then, break open the box, pour the wine, read the letters, and remember what it’s all about!
5 Ring Warming
Believed to be an Irish wedding ceremony tradition, the warming of the rings takes place when the couple’s wedding bands are passed around by the guests during the ceremony. Each person is asked to briefly hold the rings in their hands while also saying a short, silent prayer for the couple. The rings are returned to the couple with blessings and positive vibes for a long, happy marriage. Just remember to have them handy when the officiant asks for them. It can be embarrassing to have to “poll the audience” to discover who’s got the rings!
6 Wine Sipping
There are a whole lot of variations on this theme! Wine has been a symbol of life and prosperity for centuries. There are several variations of using wine during a wedding, especially at religious ceremonies, but a common option is to have two small carafes of wine, one white and one red. After exchanging rings, the couple pours the wines into a third carafe, creating a blend. They each take a sip (or several sips) of the mixed wine to represent their individual lives becoming one. The “several sips” give rise to toasting each other. Don’t get carried away!
A few additional thoughts:
· The wine glass doesn’t have to be glass.
· The wine doesn’t have to be red.
· Choose a wine that is symbolic to you.
· And lastly, the wine doesn’t even have to be wine.
Be creative! It’s your wedding . . . . .
Closely related to Wine Sipping is the Jewish tradition of . . .
7 Breaking the Glass
At Jewish weddings after the rabbi announces the newlyweds, the groom smashes a wrapped piece of glass with his foot. This is followed by applause and a cheer of "Mazel tov!" from the guests. Tradition says that the couple will remain married for as long as the glass remains shattered –– which is, of course, forever. The glass remains the exclusive property of the bride and groom –– never to be drunk from again. Why not enjoy a few sips of wine before sending the glass off to oblivion?
8 Handfasting
A handfasting ceremony has is an ancient Celtic tradition, symbolizing the binding together of two people (and the origin of the phrase "tying the knot!"). While it was most often included in Wiccan or Pagan ceremonies, today, it has become more mainstream and pops up alongside both religious and secular vows and readings.
During the ceremony, the officiant begins by explaining the ritual and what it means to the couple. This statement often includes the notion of the couple binding their lives together and the union of their hopes and desires. He then invites the couple to join hands, symbolizing their free will to enter into the marriage. Some opt to cross hands. You could also opt to stand next to one another, joining your right hand with the other's left, and have your hands bound that way, around your wrists.
Here, the officiant reads a series of vows as cords are wrapped around the couple's hands. Then he may make an additional statement about the completion of the binding and the commitment it symbolizes.
After your hands are bound, you can proceed to exchange additional vows, or use your handfasting as the vows you'll exchange and move directly to the ring exchange.
9 Foot Washing
Foot washing is a Christian ritual inspired by the Bible in John
chapter 13 verses 1-17 in which Jesus washes his disciples’ feet at the Last Supper. It’s usually done to symbolize the couple's service, humility and commitment to each other.
While there’s a wealth of internet material about the Christian significance of foot washing, it’s challenging to find anything specifically pertaining to the custom as a wedding ritual. The best I was able to find was a “first person account” by a bride who took on the challenge of developing the ceremony for her wedding.
I offer you the URL (or internet address) of her story: https://blairblogs.com/2016/01/how-to-incorporate-foot-washing-into-your-wedding-ceremony/ It’s worth the read. It is truly touching.
FINALLY . . . . . we come to . . . . .
10 Burying the Bourbon
. . . . . is a Southern tradition that’s said to prevent rain or bad weather on your wedding day. Exactly one month before your wedding, dig a hole at your ceremony site and bury an unopened bottle of bourbon upside-down. According to the superstition, you’ll have sunny skies for your wedding day! Right after the wedding dig up the bottle and enjoy with your guests. While we’re not positive this works, we can't argue that it makes for a priceless photo op.